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Thread: On Jehovah's Witnesses and Smurfs

  1. #1 On Jehovah's Witnesses and Smurfs 
    Forum Freshman portcontrol7's Avatar
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    Can any active Jehovah's Witness explain to me the process by which a Smurf comes to life and threatens people in a Kingdom Hall? I'd like more information so that I can write a paper on the physics of Satanic doll possession.




    To anyone who doesn't know, Jehovah's Witnesses had an unofficial ban on all Smurf paraphenalia in the 1980's. There were stories of Smurf dolls coming to life in the Kingdom Hall (JW church) and making foul mouthed comments, others more dangerous such as Smurfs biting children while they slept.

    http://shanmonster.net/rants/rant53.html


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  3. #2  
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    The most popular telling has this evil smurf withered by the Truth until it walks out saying, "I've had enough of this shit."

    It's a perfect fable. The smurf represents the disbeliever. You don't want to be like that ridiculous little creature do you?

    Get it?


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    Man... These Jehovas witnesses are really &$*%ed up in their brain!
    Perhaps there is some special JW drug that causes them to see these nonesense... :?
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    That sounds odd. Very odd. But then again, just because there are stories in the distant past of wierd things, doesn't mean they're going to stop today. Are there any eyewitness accounts of this event other than Jehovah's Witnesses?
    "If you wish to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first invent the universe". - Carl Sagan.
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    Heh. You all must be too young to remember this. Back in the 1980s there was fairly wide spread (and utterly hilarious) fear about this, mainly in some of the more superstitious, hyper-christian Latin American countries. Remember, these are the same people who completely flip out because they see an image somewhere that looks vaguely like a person and conclude it must be Jesus (or Mary).

    During 1983, rumors of the Smurfs' Satanic activities spread across Puerto Rico. Those who believed the theory claimed seeing Smurfs below plants in their houses, next to their beds, dressed as the devil, etc. As Telemundo Puerto Rico had just begun to telecast Smurfs programs that year, a possibility exists that a rival television channel started the rumors.

    The rumors spread like wildfire through the religiously conservative Latin America, where people went so far as to claim that small, demon-like Smurfs propagated through their recorded albums and attacked those who would play their music. This was very much in tune with the prevalent belief of the 1980s of satanic propagation through recorded music, as many rock bands made open references to satanism in their work.
    http://www.experiencefestival.com/a/...ors/id/2114807

    Most people in the US thought it was all just hilarious, but I wouldn't be surprised if groups like the Jehovah's Witnesses took it seriously. To put it as politely as possible, they seem to live in a world that's much more interesting that the world you and I live in.
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    Yes the 1980's were a strange time in this regard.

    Living in southern California, I personally felt these effects. I was very young, but I vaguely remember my box of Smurf cereal being thrown away. I also remember my niece who was my age had a Smurf board game that went out with the trash.

    Jehovah, you owe me one box of sugary cereal!
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    The same kind of thing has been happening with a bunch of other cartoon characters as well. These include He-Man, Teenage Mutant Ninja(Hero) Turtles, Pokémon, Thundercats, Power Rangers, etc. I had to get rid of a variety of figurines. What nonsense! People’s priorities has always been severely screwed-up. One kid does something and blames it on Ash from Pokémon and a whole country goes crazy, while twelve-year-old children in African countries shoot at each other with AK47's and the same people might occasionally maintain a prolonged frown.
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    Yeah...as much as people complain about the nuttiness of christians who try to get intelligent design taught in schools etc, there was really a whole different level of crazy going on in the 1980s. Lots of people were seriously worried that bizarre satanic conspiracies were everywhere, demons were waiting to possess you if you listened to the wrong kind of rock music, evil toys could come alive and attack your children, playing certain games could give you magical demonic powers, various big companies were secretly owned by Satanists etc. I'm sure some of those people are still around, but they seem much less common and don't get nearly as much press time.
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    Well since everyone has an opinion about the issue of the smurfs I will let you guys know of a true story in which involved myself.first let me start out by saying that a person shouldn't speak about things they know nothing about.If you don't know much about satan the devil and his demons then you would do yourself justice by doing some deep investigating to get to the heart of the matter.Jehovah warns us of not getting involved in things that have direct links to satan and his demons"shun spiritism in all its forms". Well when I was about 6 years old my mom had bought me all types of smurf dolls and smurf accessories.Things started out just fine but after a while the smurfs would harrass me.First I woke up in the middle of the night one day and I heard voices and I turned and looked and was terrified by what I saw. The smurf dolls were dancing around on the floor and whispering. After that they became more and more bold. They would chant my name and do things like mess up my bed room so that I would get in trouble for it. Then it got worse when I told my mom about what was happening and she didn't believe me. But one day there was a news report a little girl had been attacked by the smurf dolls she had. My mom was shocked! She still didn't believe me until one night she heard a loud noise in my bedroom. When she came into the bedroom I was under the bed sleep and the smurf dolls were pulling me further under! So you see these things do happen even if you do decide to turn a deaf earand not listen. By the way my mom nor I were JW's when this happened. The bible says that satan and his demons go from attracting to attacking and the usually prey on the weak like the children and the elderly. If anyone wanna know anything further feel free to email me.
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    Gosh that has just brought back a horrible memory!

    Yeah I had a toy Smurf once that used to talk when you pressed a button, and once i recorded it on my tape recorder and played it backwards slowly and it was really saying "Kil...kill...kill for Kali'!!

    And when my mum threw it in the bin it disappeared.

    I could have sworn I saw it in a charity shop window the other day smiling gleefully at me....i ran like the clappers!

    Can't look at the picture at the top of the page....it makes me go dizzy!

    It's the eyes and that awful grin they have
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    "Kil...kill...kill for Kali'!!
    Kill for the indian god of death (with an incidental name)?


    travelerfromk, that is one of the largest heaps of nonsense I have ever heard. Why would the mighty devil recuit inch high dolls to torment children with? What ever happened to the good old huge snarling demon beasts?
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  13. #12  
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    Quote Originally Posted by KALSTER
    "Kil...kill...kill for Kali'!!
    Kill for the indian god of death (with an incidental name)?
    I know I was shocked! I wonder what Shiva would have said about a smurf impersonating a part of Him/Her.


    Quote Originally Posted by KALSTER
    travelerfromk, that is one of the largest heaps of nonsense I have ever heard. Why would the mighty devil recuit inch high dolls to torment children with? What ever happened to the good old huge snarling demon beasts?
    Yeah!

    Snarly snorting demon beast monsters are much more fun to imagine and play with than dull geeky blue nosed smurfs!
    They all have the same expression for a start and stupid (albeit evil) grin!
    Whereas monsters can be wild eyed spewing venom or flames or be frothing at the mouth.

    You can draw big willies on monsters too and make them quite appealing.

    Big blue willies on smurfs is just not the same.
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    Kalster again you should speak about things that you know about and not what think you know about. It goes a lot deeper than what you are limiting yourself to. Satan uses a pretty good strategy to lure people into his trap and as long as you continue to be simple minded you will always be a subject of his. You probally don't believe that satan is the ruler of this world for the time being!
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    Quote Originally Posted by travelerfromk
    Kalster again you should speak about things that you know about and not what think you know about. It goes a lot deeper than what you are limiting yourself to. Satan uses a pretty good strategy to lure people into his trap and as long as you continue to be simple minded you will always be a subject of his. You probally don't believe that satan is the ruler of this world for the time being!
    Actually, I don't. And I'd bet that as long as I don't believe in him, I never have to worry about him possessing inanimate objects either.

    that you know about and not what think you know about.
    What's the difference?
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    What I think is another manifestation of this same basic phenomena was parental complaints about Dungeons and Dragons. A more recent one was scorn and warnings telling Christians to stay away from Harry Potter books and films thinking that this represented an invasion of the the occult.

    However I have first hand evidence that this kind of thing has very little to do with religion, but is more of a human thing. I am married to a Japanese person and I have often been surprised by some of the superstitions that are accepted as factual.
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    Quote Originally Posted by mitchellmckain
    I have first hand evidence that this kind of thing has very little to do with religion, but is more of a human thing. I am married to a Japanese person and I have often been surprised by some of the superstitions that are accepted as factual.
    You're type O huh?

    ..not that that there's anything wrong with that...

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    Quote Originally Posted by mitchellmckain
    I am married to a Japanese person and I have often been surprised by some of the superstitions that are accepted as factual.
    I'm sorry, I don't see the connection between being married to a Japanese person and being surprised by superstitions.

    Are the Japanese more superstitious than the rest of us or are their superstitions more surprising than ours?
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    Quote Originally Posted by numbers
    Quote Originally Posted by mitchellmckain
    I am married to a Japanese person and I have often been surprised by some of the superstitions that are accepted as factual.
    I'm sorry, I don't see the connection between being married to a Japanese person and being surprised by superstitions.

    Are the Japanese more superstitious than the rest of us or are their superstitions more surprising than ours?
    Maybe we all have our superstitions and just cannot see them, I don't know, but when we see those of another culture, then they are as plain as day.
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    Don't be so quick to call superstition what may be negative association. For example you wouldn't sleep alongside an empty coffin would you? Given the choice. That's not superstition. Then if corpses are always laid a certain way - head pointing north - and everybody knows the dead on sight by that arrangement (not bad eh?)... well you just wouldn't feel right stretching out to nap in the corpse position.

    Sanity is not always rational either. Seeking the 13th floor is a positive statement of insanity. Even though we all know 13 means nothing in itself. It survives not as superstition but as naughty option. If you know better than to seek the 13th floor, then you're probably alright in other respects.
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    Quote Originally Posted by KALSTER
    What ever happened to the good old huge snarling demon beasts?
    The problem is that no one ever actually sees huge snarling demons, so it's hard to get people worked up over them - even nutty religious people who would hypothetically agree that such things really exist. So you have to convince people that something they can actually see/deal with every day is dangerous.
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    Quote Originally Posted by travelerfromk
    Satan uses a pretty good strategy to lure people into his trap and as long as you continue to be simple minded you will always be a subject of his.
    A pretty good strategy? Really? Because what you described - causing toys to dance around and chant - doesn't seem like a very good strategy to me. If anything, that would probably just convince you that satan was real without actually accomplishing anything. Just sayin'...
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    Lemme complete this thought as it applies to JWs and Smurfs:
    Quote Originally Posted by Pong
    If you know better than to seek the 13th floor, then you're probably alright in other respects.
    That this Smurf thing is quirky and immaterial, is significant. Like the missing 13th floor, there's no practical consequence in having it or not. Smurfs serve perfectly as a harmless test of faith among JWs. It is both petty and commonplace. One can know instantly if the children of JWs are being raised as true JWs.

    All societies employ such "silly" markers.

    A little more on Japanese conformity. When my wife Yoko was a little girl growing up in Tokyo, she was ashamed of the lunches her mother packed. All the other kids would open their boxes to reveal cutsie masterpieces of motherly lunchcraft: mini wieners cut to look like octopi, carrot slices carved as flowers, home-made baby pizzas with toppings arranged as a winking carton face. There are cookbooks and magazines devoted to this art. Every mothers' magazine includes the latest lunch gimmicks. Poor Yoko just got the flat and unadorned product: an apple half chopped unimaginatively through the middle and scrunched into cling wrap, sandwich with the crust still on, etc. No sign of added care.

    Her peers couldn't help but notice. Of course they wouldn't say anything. No doubt her teachers noticed also, and wondered about the family situation. Those bald lunches were a bad sign. "Is your mother alright Yoko?"

    A sociopath may argue "but it's irrational". She's getting nutritious lunches anyway. Blind. It's supposed to be irrational. If one discounts petty human irrationality, that's a deeper test failed. It was always a trick question.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pong
    Lemme complete this thought as it applies to JWs and Smurfs:
    Quote Originally Posted by Pong
    If you know better than to seek the 13th floor, then you're probably alright in other respects.
    That this Smurf thing is quirky and immaterial, is significant. Like the missing 13th floor, there's no practical consequence in having it or not. Smurfs serve perfectly as a harmless test of faith among JWs. It is both petty and commonplace. One can know instantly if the children of JWs are being raised as true JWs.

    All societies employ such "silly" markers.

    A little more on Japanese conformity. When my wife Yoko was a little girl growing up in Tokyo, she was ashamed of the lunches her mother packed. All the other kids would open their boxes to reveal cutsie masterpieces of motherly lunchcraft: mini wieners cut to look like octopi, carrot slices carved as flowers, home-made baby pizzas with toppings arranged as a winking carton face. There are cookbooks and magazines devoted to this art. Every mothers' magazine includes the latest lunch gimmicks. Poor Yoko just got the flat and unadorned product: an apple half chopped unimaginatively through the middle and scrunched into cling wrap, sandwich with the crust still on, etc. No sign of added care.

    Her peers couldn't help but notice. Of course they wouldn't say anything. No doubt her teachers noticed also, and wondered about the family situation. Those bald lunches were a bad sign. "Is your mother alright Yoko?"

    A sociopath may argue "but it's irrational". She's getting nutritious lunches anyway. Blind. It's supposed to be irrational. If one discounts petty human irrationality, that's a deeper test failed. It was always a trick question.
    There are different levels of silliness and irrationality. I agree that it's silly to think that a child might be having trouble at home because her lunch isn't artistic enough. But it's roughly fifty billion times more silly and irrational to think that your child's stuffed toys will magically come alive and attack them. There is at least some logical connection between how much effort a mother puts into preparing food for her child and whether or not the family is experiencing problems. If a person seriously believed the whole evil possessed smurf thing I would worry that they were only a few short steps away from burning someone as a witch because they weigh less than a duck.
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    Quote Originally Posted by numbers
    Quote Originally Posted by mitchellmckain
    I am married to a Japanese person and I have often been surprised by some of the superstitions that are accepted as factual.
    I'm sorry, I don't see the connection between being married to a Japanese person and being surprised by superstitions.

    Are the Japanese more superstitious than the rest of us or are their superstitions more surprising than ours?
    Oh well numbers....surely you realise by now that the forum is simply a place for certain people to preen themselves and drop in little meaningless facts about their lives as if they think anyone cares
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    Seem silly to me, if a child saw their toys dancing around and destroying their room it would scare them just as much as seeing a giant snarling deamon. It really doesnt make sense that people argue that satan uses freaking smurfs to lure people in why not posses your mother and use her? Smurfs were not created by satan they were created by a Belgian cartoonist named Peyo. People in Belgium didnt complain about them coming to life and tormenting them so why did they start after Hanna-Barbera brought them to an english audience? This same mentality is what started witch hunts.

    child:I saw Mrs.Peters casting a spell and dancing in the woods
    adults:Children dont lie, theyre much too innocent, she must be witch lets burn her


    What would make more sense to me is satan uses people who participate in this foolishness to distract people from the real intent and purpose of christianity it has nothing to do with hunting witches or little blue men from belgium it has everything to do with accepting christ and saving your soul.
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    Actually in my experience asians are a lot more superstitious than westerners, but usually not necessarily in a "supernatural" way. They just have a tendency to believe weird things that don't make any sense. We have many asian grad students and professors in my department, and it's often amazing how they'll seriously claim something ridiculous (like eating bananas after drinking alcohol can kill you, for example) and then act surprised when everyone looks at them funny. For a REALLY good conversation, ask a korean about sleeping in a room with an electric fan some time...
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    Quote Originally Posted by Scifor Refugee
    like eating bananas after drinking alcohol can kill you, for example
    You didn't know this?

    This is just so well known to be like, incredibly dangerous. You should not do this, honestly.

    It's right up there with eating marmite soldiers with boiled eggs, which is a well-known cause of stomach cancer, and Brussel Sprouts are poisonous if you don't cut little crosses in the bottom, and if you burp and say "pardon me" three times a Faerie dies.

    Honest, I am surprised some of you people are still alive if you don't know this stuff.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Scifor Refugee
    I agree that it's silly to think that a child might be having trouble at home because her lunch isn't artistic enough. But it's roughly fifty billion times more silly and irrational to think that your child's stuffed toys will magically come alive and attack them.
    You're hung up on the mechanical facts, so you're missing the social message. Those school lunches, see, are an expression of care exceeding what is rational, necessary, or defensible in utilitarian terms. Nonsense is the only way we communicate from the heart, something more than robotics performing logically effective actions. The less reasonable the better.

    If you must find practical value in every aspect of humanity you're missing the point. Read that other thread on peacock's tails, then try again.

    See, it is supposed to be ridiculous.

    Now, how does one express faith in a religion? How do JW parents demonstrate to other parents they are raising children true to the faith. IMO the ban on Smurfs is an excellent expression. It's patently irrational yet harmless. As with Japanese school lunches, it is supposed to be irrational. If you know the kids are not allowed Smurfs, you can be quite confident all matters of their upbringing are in line with JW doctrine. That one petty detail says a lot. It works, though you won't hear any rational explanation from devotees. Logical interrogation only yields loops of nonsense. Expressions of love and faith are paradoxical that way.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pong
    If you must find practical value in every aspect of humanity you're missing the point.
    When you gave us your original story of the mothers and their lunch boxes, I wondered why they stopped with what went in the boxes. Why is the lunchbox not wrapped in a cushion of Jacquard Silk, hand embroidered with a special happy message for the day, and carried to the school on a special sleigh driven by a trained mouse and drawn by four house-trained Civet cats?

    Your latest post does, however, explain why the mothers go to the trouble they do, which was a point that Scifor Refugee was not alone in missing. Thank you.

    So, in future, when I bring my girlfriend home a bunch of flowers just because I saw them and thought she might like them, and she quizzes me to know why I bought them because she is suspicious of my motive, I can simply point her to your post and say, "If you must find practical value in every aspect of humanity you're missing the point," and she will get the point and know that I am not actually having an affair with the Brunette I met by the photo-copier last Wednesday.

    Funny how it doesn't actually work like that, isn't it?
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    Quote Originally Posted by Elen
    Seem silly to me, if a child saw their toys dancing around and destroying their room it would scare them just as much as seeing a giant snarling deamon. It really doesnt make sense that people argue that satan uses freaking smurfs to lure people in why not posses your mother and use her? Smurfs were not created by satan they were created by a Belgian cartoonist named Peyo. People in Belgium didnt complain about them coming to life and tormenting them so why did they start after Hanna-Barbera brought them to an english audience? This same mentality is what started witch hunts.

    child:I saw Mrs.Peters casting a spell and dancing in the woods
    adults:Children dont lie, theyre much too innocent, she must be witch lets burn her


    What would make more sense to me is satan uses people who participate in this foolishness to distract people from the real intent and purpose of christianity it has nothing to do with hunting witches or little blue men from belgium it has everything to do with accepting christ and saving your soul.
    every fisherman has bait. from a biblical standpoint, satan uses a variety of lures to trap or entice unsuspecting individuals. but demons like humans can also use freewill to wreak havok because they have the ability to. why do demons possess people? who knows? because they feel like it. what the bible does say however, is that the demonic forces are enemies of the forces of yehowah. and one cannot be friends of one side and be friends of the other side. it's a war of influence.

    for instance, there are people that have began studying the bible with jehovah's witnesses and then suddenly came under persistent demonic attack. I know a friend that had stuff fly off of walls and hit her on a regular basis when she bagan studying. apparently her roommate used to burn insense and pray to african gods while this was goingg on. in any case, it's all about control of worship and obedience. it's political. demonism is akin to spiritual liberalism and the original christianity as described in the bible (not the kind we see today) is akin to spiritual conservatism. ideological battles. do we owe anything to the creator or is our allegiance really to ourself?
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  32. #31  
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    .. 8)
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  33. #32  
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    Quote Originally Posted by monicker
    for instance, there are people that have began studying the bible with jehovah's witnesses and then suddenly came under persistent demonic attack.
    So does that mean that the JW were doing it right, and the demons wanted to interfere with someone who was about to find the truth? Or does it mean that the JW were doing it wrong, and opening people up to demonic influence?
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    A close friend of mine is Jehovas's witness, and he had to give up all of his Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. He gave them all to me so it was cool. However he's probably only 100 or so points away from heaven so I guess he'll have the last laugh.
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    I knew a Jehovah's witness once, but every time I went to call for him his house wasn't there.
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  36. #35 Re: On Jehovah's Witnesses and Smurfs 
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    Quote Originally Posted by portcontrol7
    Can any active Jehovah's Witness explain to me the process by which a Smurf comes to life and threatens people in a Kingdom Hall? I'd like more information so that I can write a paper on the physics of Satanic doll possession.




    To anyone who doesn't know, Jehovah's Witnesses had an unofficial ban on all Smurf paraphenalia in the 1980's. There were stories of Smurf dolls coming to life in the Kingdom Hall (JW church) and making foul mouthed comments, others more dangerous such as Smurfs biting children while they slept.

    http://shanmonster.net/rants/rant53.html
    Ever heard of the black smurfs?

    I know thinking now it was a politically-incorrect play, mind you, these black smurfs where like the alter-ego of the smurfs.

    Only the mind can think twice simultaneously about a subject, but only one thing can inexorably come out of it. A choice.
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  37. #36 Re: On Jehovah's Witnesses and Smurfs 
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    Quote Originally Posted by Manynames
    Ever heard of the black smurfs?

    I know thinking now it was a politically-incorrect play, mind you, these black smurfs where like the alter-ego of the smurfs.

    I believe they quickly changed them from black to purple (for obvious reasons).
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  38. #37 Re: On Jehovah's Witnesses and Smurfs 
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    Quote Originally Posted by Scifor Refugee
    Quote Originally Posted by Manynames
    Ever heard of the black smurfs?

    I know thinking now it was a politically-incorrect play, mind you, these black smurfs where like the alter-ego of the smurfs.

    I believe they quickly changed them from black to purple (for obvious reasons).
    Ahhh... Talking about leaving a trademark though... i used to have black smurfs on my old nintendo computer game lol
    Only the mind can think twice simultaneously about a subject, but only one thing can inexorably come out of it. A choice.
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