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Thread: Perpetuum Momentum : Sci-Fi Story - Futurosofhic tale i am writing

  1. #1 Perpetuum Momentum : Sci-Fi Story - Futurosofhic tale i am writing 
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    If you google on " Baboesjkabrains " and click the blog at the top,


    and go to the third item in the blog dated 14 november 2011,

    called "Anatomy of the Universe - A short story of the future",


    you can read this free and unfinished sci-fi story i am writing on the adventure of a special kind of man on a mission.


    (No commercial intent of any kind.)


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    Moderator Moderator Cogito Ergo Sum's Avatar
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    I gave your story a look and I admire the efforts you have done so far, but there are a few remarks that I would like to share with you:
    1. It is advisable to choose another format for your story. It would clarify the structure of the text and you would not have to mention the name of the speaker every time a dialogue is introduced. Stating the protagonist and then presenting its lines feels like one is reading a play.
    2. It is recommendable to leave the notes out of your text. It worsens readability and people who do not understand Dutch might become confused. One solution is to publish your non-finished story without any notes, whilst you save a draft on your PC where you insert your notes.


    "The only safe rule is to dispute only with those of your acquaintance of whom you know that they possess sufficient intelligence and self-respect not to advance absurdities; to appeal to reason and not to authority, and to listen to reason and yield to it; and, finally, to be willing to accept reason even from an opponent, and to be just enough to bear being proved to be in the wrong."

    ~ Arthur Schopenhauer, The Art of Being Right: 38 Ways to Win an Argument (1831), Stratagem XXXVIII.
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    Thank you for the comments, that makes sense.

    The most difficult part is to build some kind of drama, i'm not very good at that, i concentrated on the contents, and now the whole needs to become more coherent as a complete story, your remarks fit in that section i think.



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    "Science may set limits to knowledge, but should not set limits to imagination."
    ~ Bertrand Russell, History of Western Philosophy (1947), p.34

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