Thread: Approval Junkies

Originally Posted by Jake Green (character in the movie "Revolver")

There is something about yourself that you don't know. Something that you will deny even exists, until it's too late to do anything about it. It's the only reason you get up in the morning. The only reason you suffer the shitty puss, the blood, the sweat and the tears. This is because you want people to know how good, attractive, generous, funny, wild and clever you really are. Fear or revere me, but please, think I'm special. We share an addiction. We're approval junkies. We're all in it for the slap on the back and the gold watch. The hip-hip-hoo-fuckin' rah. Look at the clever boy with the badge, polishing his trophy. Shine on you crazy diamond, because we're just monkeys wrapped in suits, begging for the approval of others.

I think this is genious. What do you all think?

Can you guess what the "something" is that he is talking about? I think I know.

Can you guess what the "something" is that he is talking about? I think I know.

Chocolate-chip pancakes.

With lots of syrup....but that's two somethings.

The ability to give myself a BJ? 8)

Oh, and the "too late", refers to breaking your neck in the attempt.

this guy sounds like he got a chip on his shoulder. wtf. love conquers hate. nuff said.

Love conquers hate? That's not enough said. Have you noticed the state of the world?

But he explained himself just after....? He's referring to our need for approval. ...I agree that we're all like junkies; I disagree that it's always for approval. I guess I don't really get the context either though

Wow I think everyone missed that one. :P

Ya, I watched the movie about two or three times before I grasped the full concept. The "something" that he is speaking of is the ego. The ego creates many things. It can give you a phobea, illness, allergy, talent, a look, or anything. People respect you because of you ego's character. It can control every part of you if you are not aware of it.

Notice the line: "Something that you will deny even exists, until it's too late to do anything about it." Is it possible you are denying it right now?

Originally Posted by DaBOB

People respect you because of you ego's character. It can control every part of you if you are not aware of it.

We must be using different definitions. I am my ego.

Cogito ergo sum.

Originally Posted by Ophiolite

Originally Posted by DaBOB

People respect you because of you ego's character. It can control every part of you if you are not aware of it.

We must be using different definitions. I am my ego.

Cogito ergo sum.

It is very likely that we are using different definitions. The word ego has about 3 or 4 different translations that I know of.

In this case I am using the Buddhist perspective. Hard to explain... It's like when you go to have a donut and you know it's not good for you and it costs money and you would probably feel better if you didn't have it, yet you have it anyways. When you act differently among different freinds. One that I like (that people may disagree with) is phobia. The ego gives you an identity and makes you believe it is real. Another example is taste. Everyone can enjoy the taste of everything, it is the ego that is deciding when something tastes good or bad because it gives you a sense of identity. This identity is the approval that is talked about in the quote.

i just realized something... my ego keeps me alive oh thank you ego! thanks a lot! i love you you know that?

One could posit any number of 'hidden causes' in human behaviour. Perhaps it is the need to clip one's nailfingers that drives one to do everything - everything is but a veil to sustain clipping of one's nailfingers.

The only difference between this and other approaches to determine the most fundamental drive is the 'naturalism' behind it. If we look at Nietzsche's will to power it is in contrast more naturalistic. It speaks of growth and enhancement of power.. The smallest insect seeks to grow, to enhance itself in various means.

In any case, all these explanations are about the 'unknown' region of the human psyche.. Any statements thereof are unverifiable and therefore the most interesting theory is that theory that grants us the most use.

What use is it to us to believe in the myth that all we want is approval of others? In many ways, this would be counter to life - I believe it is a bad myth.

Mr U

i thought the "something" was what he explained in the second part there. the need for approval. why we get up, why we go to sleep, why we do anything... in his view, for approval.

as for your ego-blurb... well i'm skeptical, just like i am with pretty much every notion you bring up :P

I like approval, but chocolate chip pancakes are great too.

If you analyze anything, you are going to find a disillusioning principle behind it, and there are no exceptions to that. We get up every morning, make ourselves look good, go out and achieve things, help a few people along the way. The reasons behind that will always boil down to benefitting ourselves. But the way I see it, helping others and helping yourself are not mutually exclusive. If I am leading a good life, I don't really care what my hidden motives are as long as they are not hurting anyone, and neither should anyone else.

Originally Posted by Draculogenes

i thought the "something" was what he explained in the second part there. the need for approval. why we get up, why we go to sleep, why we do anything... in his view, for approval.

as for your ego-blurb... well i'm skeptical, just like i am with pretty much every notion you bring up :P

Yes it is explained. If you watch the whole movie it makes more sense. A need of approval is just one way of putting it. They also refer to it as a person called "Sam Gold". It's a pretty cool movie if you like that psychological stuff.

Originally Posted by .:Elusive.Neutrino:.

We get up every morning, make ourselves look good, go out and achieve things, help a few people along the way. The reasons behind that will always boil down to benefitting ourselves. But the way I see it, helping others and helping yourself are not mutually exclusive. If I am leading a good life, I don't really care what my hidden motives are as long as they are not hurting anyone, and neither should anyone else.

Aaah but you have missed something. Approval is not just good things. It is anything and everything. It chains us to a specific way of being instead of being spontaneous. In fact sponteniety could be a part of that approval. One of my favorites is taste. We act like we dislike things when in fact it is nothing more than an approval act. There are some tastes (particularly bitter) that are very strong and often distasteful the first time but that is only for natural safety reasons. If you know a food is not dangerous there is no reason whatsoever for it to taste bad. Unless at some level you have decided that it should taste bad.

I guess it all depends on how you look at it. If you have a fine life than maybe it really doesn't matter. I look at things differenty though. I see something fearful or unusual and see it as a chance to improve upon myself (sorta like parkour).

hmm this idea of tastes sounds similar to your theory on mentally controlled allergies.

well i'd stay and chat but i have to go cure aids with good will and brain waves... i'll be back later though..

Are you saying that the taste idea is not true? Because I assure you it is. It is acctually very simple to do. I began doing it about two years ago. I can enjoy everything I eat. With a controlled ego you can also still have favorites; it gives you a more noticable (or approvable) personality. As opposed to just eating everything without judgement.

Like the quote tries to get accross; if you don't understand or can't apply it to yourself than you are simply denying it.

I have had people say I am just faking that I enjoy it. Well obviously that would be a very silly thing to do. Then I thought on it for a bit. I think at first I was faking it. It gets to a point though where you take down the walls of the ego and you truly enjoy what you are eating. I used to hate tomatoes (for absolutely no reason at all) and now I have caprice salads all the time, I love them.

Anyways, whether you choose to "believe" it or not it can't hurt to try.

far too much anecdotal evidence from you... which is, sadly enough, useless. tastes change... tastebuds like an dislike certain things. Kids don't like bitter food and adults don't like sweet food(as much as kids do of course). people have different palettes and that isn't something you can screw around with.

Tell yourself you will like the taste of bleach and have a few spoonfuls, or that limeskins are your favourite thing to eat. you will never enjoy those, tastes and if you do, you are delusional. So why can you do it for say, tomatoes and avocadoes and not other substances? go have a pint of sour milk.. lemme know how it goes.

too much....

I'm not going to argue this with you. I do it all the time. I realized it when I was young and always used the "I don't like it" excuse to not eat my vegetables. One day I realized why the hel don't I like it. When I realized there was no reason and the only one at a disadvantage was me I decided to hell with it, I'm going to enjoy all food.

I already pointed out that there are certain tastes that 'naturally' are bad at first (usually bitter). This is because they are part of the bodies defence against poisons. Once you acknowledge that they aren't poisones however, they taste just fine.

The whole point of enjoying all food is to enjoy it. Why would I have any reason to enjoy drinking bleach or eating a lime skins? You can shoot it down all you want but in the end it works and that's the way it is. Why the hell would I lie to you? Also, tomatoes was just a small example. I recently ate a few preserved duck eggs. The problem with those is that they leave behind a smell that most people don't like; so I would have to caryy a ton of breath mints around.

Anyways, back to the point. Another quote I love from the movie is "wherever you don't want to go is where you will find him." Him being ego. Now many people will look at that and say "oh so I should go jump off a cliff". Well I'll tell you now and it should be obvious) that no that is not what it means. The point of the statement is for self improvement. If there is something you are irrationally afraid of doing than you must frist understand that it is not you who doesn't want to do it. If you no it is an irrational fear than someone else is tell you to fear it (someone in your own head that is). And how do you find this someone? By doing what you are so afraid of. Accept instead of just doing it and being scared to death, try to observe yourself. Listen to the excuses you are giving yourself and take control of them. This can be applied in practically any situation in our lives. If your ever about to do something you know you will regret, even the tiniest bit, stop and think about it. If your going to regret it than why the hell do you want to do it?

For example: if I don't stop writting this soon I wll be late for school, so why the hell am I still writting. :P I'll stop with that.