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Thread: Awkward situation

  1. #1 Awkward situation 
    Forum Ph.D. Heinsbergrelatz's Avatar
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    yesterday, i was hanging out with my girlfriend, and when we arrived to have dinner, she like suddenly paid.... i mean i totally had the cash to pay for both of us, but i have no idea, she just paid..

    i was kinda shocked and felt awkward and i didn't even say anything, like "thank you", or "let me pay you back"

    what is a logical solution here?

    thank you


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  3. #2  
    Forum Cosmic Wizard i_feel_tiredsleepy's Avatar
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    I wouldn't do anything about it.

    Although, I'm gay so I go with the whoever asked who out pays rule, or 50/50. If you've been with someone for a while you usually get into a groove over how you pay for things, I used to alternate with my last bf.


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  4. #3  
    Veracity Vigilante inow's Avatar
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    Uhmm... Say, "thank you."


    Also, perhaps a more important question... Did you put out? 8)
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  5. #4  
    Forum Cosmic Wizard i_feel_tiredsleepy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by inow
    Uhmm... Say, "thank you."


    Also, perhaps a more important question... Did you put out? 8)
    Well I hope she got something for her money.

    Edit: Jesus, I must be tired, I keep omitting words.
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  6. #5  
    Forum Ph.D. Heinsbergrelatz's Avatar
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    i mean... i didn't say it on the spot, so i should probably say "thanK you" on monday?
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  7. #6  
    Veracity Vigilante inow's Avatar
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    Me personally? Yes, I think that's a perfect idea. Then, it also opens up the opportunity for you to engage in another conversation with her... "Hey, thanks for dinner the other night. I had a good time. Let's do something together again this Thursday. We could go to blah."

    Reading your thread, it appears you're feeling weird more because a girl paid for your dinner. If that's the case, don't be. It's almost 2011, so don't be so old-fashioned and misogynistic. If things work out between the two of you, you'll have plenty of opportunities to be the one paying for events when you hang out together.
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  8. #7  
    Forum Ph.D. Heinsbergrelatz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by inow
    Me personally? Yes, I think that's a perfect idea. Then, it also opens up the opportunity for you to engage in another conversation with her... "Hey, thanks for dinner the other night. I had a good time. Let's do something together again this Thursday. We could go to blah."

    Reading your thread, it appears you're feeling weird more because a girl paid for your dinner. If that's the case, don't be. It's almost 2011, so don't be so old-fashioned and misogynistic. If things work out between the two of you, you'll have plenty of opportunities to be the one paying for events when you hang out together.
    thanks for that, you are a great help
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  9. #8  
    Forum Freshman Porphyrogenita's Avatar
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    Keep in mind that if she paid and it is an unusual thing for you two, she must have thought about it ahead of time and had her reason. Maybe she felt bad that you were always paying, maybe she was raised to go Dutch, etc. Nothing awkward really. You were right not to argue or make a big deal out of it.

    Although it wouldn't hurt to learn how she feels about paying, if you guys are going to be getting serious. Disagreement over money is the biggest cause of divorce, and the disagreements stem from each person's basic attitude about money, so it's good to know where you stand sooner rather than later. Best of luck for you two!
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  10. #9  
    Veracity Vigilante inow's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Heinsbergrelatz
    thanks for that, you are a great help
    My pleasure.
    TBH, I was kinda retarded with girls when I was younger, and really figured stuff out in and after college. When you get right down to it, a lot of it is about self-confidence, knowing who you are as a man, and recognizing that girls are also human often struggling with the same questions and uncertainties as us.

    It's all about having a good time and being excellent to each other. After that, little else matters.
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  11. #10  
    Forum Isotope
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    To reinforce inow's point, it is often a good idea to not even think about it in terms of a separation of sexes. Boy, girl, man, woman, we're all pretty much the same, with the similar issues, desires, and questions. The best thing I've noticed is being able to appreciate just being together, without worrying about having to do something, or caring who's job it is to do what. Me and my fiance are in more of a dual supporting type of relationship, we both work, and kind of trade off who pays each week by way of convenience. We both just enjoy being with each other, stress free. I think if you drop your inhibitions, allow yourself to just go with the flow, and be appreciative of the time you have with her, you'll feel less awkward and really enjoy being in the relationship a lot more than you think.

    Disclaimer: Spoken from personal experience, I am by no means an expert on relationships
    Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools, because they have to say something.
    -Plato

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  12. #11  
    Forum Cosmic Wizard i_feel_tiredsleepy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by inow
    recognizing that girls are also human often struggling with the same questions and uncertainties as us.
    What an outlandish idea, they're clearly some sort of mutated variety of cactus.

    @AM I wouldn't worry about being qualified to give advice about women. I didn't hesitate to give my two cents, and I've never even touched a naked woman. Although, rumour has it that gays have a sixth sense for understanding the fairer sex. If there's a God, that sixth sense would be a cruel joke, because I struggle enough at understanding what's in the mind of my fellow men.
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