Hi everyone!
This is my first post here and I am hoping some of you intelligent people here can give me some feedback on this case. I typed out a lot of details about the scene then realized I should probably just start with the most basic question then if you all need more details I can go from there. Unfortunately, I found my fiance and child's father deceased sitting in a chair on the balcony. I woke up and noticed the door to the balcony was wide open. Then I saw him...I knew he was dead right away. I suppose this is something you can only relate to if you have also seen a dead body. My dearest loved one had a very serious drug addiction/mental health issues. My first reaction was that he had overdosed - the officials on the scene also seemed to agree. I knew his family would be in a heavy state of denial about this because they refused to acknowledge his drug problems no matter how hard I tried to get help from them. That is a whole other story that may be relevant as I go on with this. When we went to go view his body at the funeral home (just for family only), he was only covered in a blanket and I noticed and remarked how he had had a sunburn and I had told him to wear sunscreen or put the top back up on his convertible. When I said that, one of the men who worked in the funeral home brought up what he believed to be "unusual" bruising on the tops of his shoulders. Then the other man came over and started talking about it too - saying it looked like it could've come from someone's hands. The bruising was said to have occurred before he died but I had been with him and never noticed the bruises.
His parents, who like I said were heavily in denial about the drugs, took those comments and ran with it - proclaiming immediately that someone must've killed him. They don't speak to me anymore because I wouldn't go along with their murder theories. I was there and feel I would've heard something for sure, there was no forced entry or anything like that, and I don't see how anyone could get up to the balcony. When I insisted that the medical examiner is who they would need to speak to they kept going on to me that they would just sum it up to another druggie death and not pay any attention. I knew that was ludicrous, and said I didn't agree with them and they just needed to trust in the officials to find the cause of death. I was told that I was letting a murderer get away with it and some other hostile comments. After that, they refused to speak to me anymore (so I still don't know the results of the toxicology or the cause of death) - and don't even pretend to care about our child anymore now that they know I will not say things happened that did not happen in order to get them what they want.
They are really hell-bent on making this a homicide finding and for more reasons than I can even get into here.
I sent some text messages to his grandmother because it is bothering me not knowing the results or what is going on. She finally talked to me but I knew she was lying about the toxicology report not being back yet (it has been 4 months and when he died we were told 4-6weeks for the results). A few weeks after this, I found out that investigators took the laptop and his cell phone following pressure from his family, and that the official cause of death is still "pending".
We were to get married just 1 month after his death, but since I am technically not married to him I am not considered next of kin so I don't know if officials can speak to me about this or not - but I doubt it. I know my child is next of kin but my child is a minor. I am heartbroken to an extreme level and feel like I need to know what was the exact cause. His head was leaned far back over the chair when I found him (no head support)...could this cause the bruising on the tops of his shoulders? What could cause something like that - would it have to be from someone's hands? I find it extremely unlikely that someone came in and attacked him - seems I would've heard something and my fiance would've fought tooth and nail before just letting someone kill him. Autopsy was unremarkable but the bruising was noted. That is all that was noted. I know this because the results came in while his parents were still speaking to me and they let me know that.
The only thing strange is I do remember the night before we were sitting on the front porch and he said there was a car watching the house and rushed me inside. I never saw the car though for myself. It's also strange that he didn't seem intoxicated when I went to bed but then I woke up to find him dead. However, I'm sure he could've ingested enough drugs after I was already asleep to cause an overdose. I have been through this before with him and I do know it can happen suddenly. The coroner estimated he died between 4-6am. I was heavily asleep during those hours. I feel horrible that I was so nearby to him sleeping while he was sitting out there dying....this is killing me....I especially can't come to grips with how someone could've killed him and me not hear anything. I am a heavy sleeper but surely he would've screamed out very loudly or some loud noise out of the ordinary would've happened?
His family are not really known for telling the truth, but if no official cause of death is made after 4 months and they agreed to look at his laptop and phone, then does that mean he really may have been murdered?!?! I had thought the officials believed it to be an accidental overdose. Do I have any rights at all to know what is going on? What do you all think about the bruising on tops of his shoulders?
If I need to help with any other details please let me know. I have no one to talk to about this and it is killing me/driving me crazy not being in the loop on what is going on. My life froze when he died and it still feels like it just happened. I am suffering with PTSD also as a result of this situation so it's very hard for me to even discuss this at all. I finally was able to bring myself to type this out tonight because I really need some sort of answers. He was the love of my life and this is the most devastating experience to have to go through. I never lost hope in him because I knew how wonderful his potential really was but he was a very troubled person and he did have enemies.
Thank you in advance, I appreciate any/all feedback that you can give me!