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View Poll Results: Is Teasing a good thing or a bad thing?

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  • Good thing

    3 37.50%
  • Bad thing

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Thread: Why do people tease?

  1. #1 Why do people tease? 
    The Doctor Quantime's Avatar
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    What is the purpose behind it?

    In my opinion it is a way for:

    A: The teaser wanting attention shifting
    B: The teased is actually being shown affection by this 'special' treatment.

    Any ideas?


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  3. #2  
    WYSIWYG Moderator marnixR's Avatar
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    bonus points for raising a question that i must admit i'd never even considered

    now that i think about it, isn't teasing a bit like trolling on a forum ? intended as harmless fun but annoying if not received well ?


    "Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away." (Philip K. Dick)
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  4. #3  
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    I think you think you are being teased at the moment, I also believe that you cannot believe this and are looking for a way to imagine that somebody likes you, well you mother might I suppose!
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  5. #4  
    The Doctor Quantime's Avatar
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    What do you mean Megabrain?
    "If you wish to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first invent the universe". - Carl Sagan
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  6. #5  
    Moderator Moderator AlexP's Avatar
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    Someone gets teased themself, so they develop emotional problems and take them out on others by doing the teasing themselves.
    "There is a kind of lazy pleasure in useless and out-of-the-way erudition." -Jorge Luis Borges
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  7. #6  
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    I believe that teasing is part of the defense mechanism -> reaction formation. We tease others to express our love for them
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  8. #7  
    Forum Bachelors Degree Demen Tolden's Avatar
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    I have spent much thought on this a few months back. My ideas went into different avenues on it, so I don't myself have an exact answer. I think there is too much ground to cover for just one strait answer. The main points I had come to are these:

    1) Teasing is a form of aggresion directed at others.

    2) I saw that people who directed more aggression towards others were typically bitter, negative people. This bitterness seemed to be a somewhat permenent trait that was aquired through life experience.

    3) Many people make friends by directing aggression towards others, and also don't seem to be aware of it.

    4) Aggression seems to be something all living creatures are naturally born with. I've seen a Joeseph Campbell video where he talks about how male gorillas when they are very young start to push around the other females, and he talks of a couple tribes of people long ago that fought eachother once a year as a type of ritual even though there was more than enough land, food, and resources for both to live. Joe Campbell's points in the video were different from mine, but I was just stuck on this idea of aggression. Its very interesting to me.

    These are just some of my observations that I have made keeping ideas of aggression in mind while watching people.
    The most important thing I have learned about the internet is that it needs lot more kindness and patience.
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  9. #8  
    Forum Cosmic Wizard paralith's Avatar
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    Just to clarify, you all are referring to the kind of teasing that is intended to hurt/offend, correct? There is, after all, genuinely friendly teasing amongst friends and family, where joking with each other is part of their affection. I also know some people who intend to do the latter but end up doing the former largely because they just don't know where to draw the line, and not because they actually mean to offend.
    Man can will nothing unless he has first understood that he must count on no one but himself; that he is alone, abandoned on earth in the midst of his infinite responsibilities, without help, with no other aim than the one he sets himself, with no other destiny than the one he forges for himself on this earth.
    ~Jean-Paul Sartre
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  10. #9  
    Forum Professor Obviously's Avatar
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    Teasing is also used to show dominance/power. So in that respect, it's a bad thing, picking on the weak to improve your position etc. But as allready stated, teasing can be used for friendly interactions, so in that respect, it's not so bad.
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  11. #10  
    The Doctor Quantime's Avatar
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    Being clear in my opinion there is postive teasing and negative teasing.

    Positive teasing is when it is a way of showing someone when you are the teaser that you are showing more attention to that person than someone else, as long as it stays fine and all well fun thats ok.

    Negative teasing is the manifestation of jealousy, envy or some other negative emotion. For instance, I get teased a lot. I don't know why. Here on this forum is a good example, ToR seems to like teasing me goodness knows why, I tend to take teasing two ways, for some reason ToR's teasing is in the middle, I'm just emotional at times.

    I used to get teased and still do by a lot of people, people at school used to wind me up, my brothers and father still do, but sometimes they say they meant it in good fun when I respond negativley, they change their facial expression and start showing defensive body language. I've always thought people like picking on me. But as of now I believe that people see my laid back, relaxed happy life with what little I have, along side my intelligence and potential greater intelligence, charm etc etc yada yada that they don't like, so they come up with the one thing to get at me, my weakness to being hurt by those I love. Which sounds a bit sick if you think, those who love and care for me enjoy hurting me , or at least have never learned that I don't like it, espically with my youth and trouble I had.
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  12. #11  
    Forum Professor serpicojr's Avatar
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    Maybe you've got to chill out and not take things so seriously?
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  13. #12  
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    From all the posts and threads he makes that suggest clearly he is vrey insecure I'd say it's about time he got laid, go and find a good one and pay for it if you have to but please get laid soon!
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  14. #13  
    Forum Professor serpicojr's Avatar
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    But can you get laid if you're insecure? It's the chicken and the egg...
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  15. #14  
    The Doctor Quantime's Avatar
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    Life isn't all about sex Megabrain. And it sure as hell may relieve tension. But you have to dive back in. Everyone insists that sex is everything, but it isn't. And last, my personal life has absolutley, positivley nothing to do with you.

    Serpicojr. I always take things seriosuly. I'm a scientist, there is no such thing as a day off for me. It just hurts me that I help people and I get walked on for it. Nevertheless, I'll continue to help others. Its a force within me that does it, maybe its Jesus :?.

    Anyway. The topic is drifting off. Paralith, Demen Tolden, Obviously, Chemboy and Neptune Circle have given me good enough reason to classify teasing scientifically now until it needs varying again due to my best friend.

    EDIT: I'm not secure! I wear my heart on my sleeve. I'm honest all the way and will never change no matter, (just had deja vu) what happens.
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  16. #15  
    Forum Professor serpicojr's Avatar
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    I'm saying that maybe people aren't necessarily teasing you out of spite. Maybe they're not trying to walk all over you, maybe they're not trying to hurt you. If someone you care about is teasing you, presumably it's just a joke. If someone you don't care about is teasing you... well, you don't care about them, so what's to feel bad about, even if they are trying to get to you?
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  17. #16  
    The Doctor Quantime's Avatar
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    Thats it. They do it quite frequently. Not so much recently because without my religion I've basically told them to f off and calling them all sorts of things. Now I don't want to do that, I love them. I care about all people even if they piss me off now and again *cough*megabrain*cough*. The fact that people are trying to get at me is evidence in the fact that they don't care as much about me as they let on. I'd never tease them. Maybe that just means, oh I don't know.
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  18. #17  
    WYSIWYG Moderator marnixR's Avatar
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    think about it : if you know that someone is easily goaded, wouldn't you feel tempted to have a dig, even if it's only a friendly one

    i know i do, even though i wish the person in question no malice
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  19. #18  
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    No, I really don't have any urge to get at someone if easily 'goaded'. Any dig in my opinion is not a friendly one. I point out flaws, but if I do, ALWAYS slam it between to pieces of praise . But I never hurt anyone, or at least intend it. If one is hurt from me, its me being honest and no harm intended. If I ever wanted to hurt I could be the most evil b4st4rd on this planet, and I dread to ever meet my opposite.
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  20. #19  
    WYSIWYG Moderator marnixR's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by svwillmer
    No, I really don't have any urge to get at someone if easily 'goaded'. Any dig in my opinion is not a friendly one.
    oh well, that's me put in my place then - i'm obviously not cut out for sainthood
    then again, you wouldn't, coming from an atheist, would you ?
    "Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away." (Philip K. Dick)
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  21. #20  
    Forum Professor serpicojr's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by svwillmer
    Any dig in my opinion is not a friendly one.
    You're just setting yourself up to get hurt. You know that many people tease in a friendly manner. But your mindset assumes the worst of these people and incorrectly characterizes their intentions as negative.
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  22. #21  
    The Doctor Quantime's Avatar
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    You know these topics I post always ends up me leaning some lesson. I never assume that people are negative when I meet them. I never assume they are bad people, just peeved at times like we all get.

    I hope I haven't offended you marnixR .
    "If you wish to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first invent the universe". - Carl Sagan
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  23. #22  
    WYSIWYG Moderator marnixR's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by svwillmer
    I hope I haven't offended you marnixR .
    no worries mate
    i'm thick-skinned
    "Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away." (Philip K. Dick)
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  24. #23  
    The Doctor Quantime's Avatar
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    Which is more than you can say for your avatar .
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  25. #24  
    WYSIWYG Moderator marnixR's Avatar
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    you havin' a go at my avatar ?
    now step outside and start bleeding !
    "Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away." (Philip K. Dick)
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  26. #25  
    Forum Professor serpicojr's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by svwillmer
    You know these topics I post always ends up me leaning some lesson. I never assume that people are negative when I meet them. I never assume they are bad people, just peeved at times like we all get.
    Now that's the right attitude.
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  27. #26  
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    Some people on this forum come across as so pedantic, egotistical, arrogant, obnoxious and superior without good reason,

    That it's difficult NOT to tease and pop their bubble.

    And then it is hilarious when they argue back and get hoity-toity and humpy about it.

    It just shows them to be more arrogant, obnoxious and egocentric than previously presumed!

    Maybe i've just got a preverted SOH but i think they make fair game.

    If only at least to try and get them to see how foolish they look.
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  28. #27  
    WYSIWYG Moderator marnixR's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Minxy
    Some people on this forum come across as so pedantic, egotistical, arrogant, obnoxious and superior without good reason
    is it ok to be all of the above with a good reason ?
    "Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away." (Philip K. Dick)
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  29. #28  
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    Quote Originally Posted by marnixR
    Quote Originally Posted by Minxy
    Some people on this forum come across as so pedantic, egotistical, arrogant, obnoxious and superior without good reason
    is it ok to be all of the above with a good reason ?
    In your case MarnixR, anything goes.
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  30. #29  
    WYSIWYG Moderator marnixR's Avatar
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    in that case, i'll have to start thinking of some good reasons - i may be some time
    "Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away." (Philip K. Dick)
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  31. #30  
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    Quote Originally Posted by marnixR
    in that case, i'll have to start thinking of some good reasons - i may be some time

    Blimey, you are being modest aren't you?

    Or you are just one of those kinds of people that don't realise how gifted they are?
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  32. #31  
    WYSIWYG Moderator marnixR's Avatar
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    not being modest

    it's just my way of implying that there may be precious few reasons to act pedantic, egotistical, arrogant, obnoxious and superior

    + at the same time i also know how easy it is to come across that way on a forum
    "Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away." (Philip K. Dick)
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  33. #32  
    Forum Freshman teeniewitabeenie1's Avatar
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    it makes them feel good temporarly...
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