Hi. Just a general question. Does anyone here like poetry or have any of their own? I'm going to share my first poem that I made years and years ago and compare it to one recent. Please tell me what you think.
6th June 1944...Normandy
The Higgins boat gently rocks over the waves
I wonder that if on the horizon, there lie our graves
Solemnly we wait for the inevitable to arrive
Praying that hopefully, we'll make it out alive
I look at my platoon, seeing them full of fright
Preparing to do our duty with all of our might
Myself I am filled full of fear
As slowly, that beach draws ever near
The shells bombard us, that one was a near miss
I have a flash back, my mother blowing me a kiss
Seeing this I realise that for freedom, the invasion must be won
Short, tall, old or young, we must kill the Hun
Finally we arrive, down goes the ramp, along with my friends
Despite this we must stay strong and fight to our bitter ends!
Being here is like dodging raindrops, which is almost impossible to do
The obstacles are like umbrellas, so here I am, stuck to one like glue
I can see the whole beach, wounded soldiers that will probably die
Amidst all of this, I am crouched, wondering if my end is nigh.
At last I muster the courage to advance
To fight, prevail and win back France
Out here in battle we fight side by side
And we do so with honour, dignity and outstanding pride
Eventually we reach the sea wall wounded and hurt
Our eyes, mouth, nose and ears clogged up by dirt
Boom! The Bangalore’s blow and clear the barbed wire
From up here, I can see the whole beach blazed in a fire
Now we raid the German's bunkers and eliminate any threat
These soldiers are some of the youngest I have ever met
They surrender, but for the blood that they have spilt, I shall not accept!
More revengeful soldiers arrived, up they came, and slower they crept
They were filled with vengeance, anger and bad intention
But I say "No wait! We must uphold the Geneva Convention!"
Finally they repress their emotion because a fighting soldier should
Looking at the Germans, I notice that like myself, they are also covered in blood
Reinforcements arrive, the beach is secure and at last we are safe
I know it's down to trust and hope in my faith
I climb the hill and stand tall knowing we have achieved victory
If I live through the war, I can tell my children and Grandchildren this amazing story
As I finally catch my breath and have a snack to eat
I hope and pray that this event shall never repeat
Now alive I turn to see my friends, but realise that they are not there
I weep and cry, shouting that it's not fair
But knowing that there deaths were for freedom and peace, I can accept that they have gone
So now I do what every soldier did today, I fight......and I carry on.
Any feedback positive or negative or grey will be much appreciated. Please share your poetry if you have any.